Ahoy, me maties!
It be talk like a pirate day, and ye better be talkin' like a pirate! Savvy?
As fer yer Captain of the shiny, I be cooking up some terrible plans. Me crew is on shore leave, which allows me the quiet to plot. I suggest ye keep a weather eye on the horizon, as I've plundered much booty from ships that cross me path.
(Brought to you by Talk Like A Pirate Day)